Starr light, starr bright… I met Alice Starr tonight! Okay, not exactly tonight, but I did meet Baylor’s “first lady” this afternoon at the Baylor University Women’s Council of Dallas at their luncheon.
Anyhow, the luncheon was fun– I got to dress up, see one of my best friends, Torie, meet some really cool women, and eat a fancy smancy meal. Most exciting part of the afternoon for me was chatting with the woman I ended up sitting next to at the table. She is a well-known Christian author! I came home and “bing-ed” (my dad, the Microsoft guru, would be so proud I didn’t use “googled”) her, and she has written some really amazing stuff! Best part of all, she gave me her card and said she would send my name to her publishers, friends, and other specific contacts to try to help me get freelance work. It was such a God thing that out of all the women in that room, the two of us were at the same table, sitting side-by-side. God is so good!
Lately, I have been struggling with trusting God to show me a path through this whole getting a job thing. My parents are starting to hear that Baylor tuition slowly run down the drain, student loans are knocking at my back door, friends’ and family, for whom I would love to buy gifts, birthdays are coming up, gas must be purchased in order to go to job fairs, interviews, appointments, and meetings, I’m starting to ache to shop for fall clothes and knickknacks… the list goes on. I, as I’m sure you all may know by now, am a big stresser. Today I was abrubtly reminded by a good friend to slow down and trust. God doesn’t command for us to put the demands of money, jobs, security, activities, or even parents’ first in our life priorities. He demands for us to “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind” (Matthew 20:37). In my current situation, I also find myself reminded of the 10 commandments. God says, “You shall not make for yourself an idol in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God…” (Exodus 20:4-5). Am I obsessing over making money, impressing people, the cool job title, and self-made pride over my relationship with THE creator? Is security my idol? If so, how did I let that happen?? I thought that commandment was the least of my worries (I was concentrating more on my more current struggle: “honor your father and mother.” Haha, just kidding mom and dad! :))
What I am trying to say is that, I need to learn to trust more, to surrender my golden calf. I’ve heard people say it time and time again but until I actually live out a total surrender and trust in God, I will never find true peace. Man oh man, this is not going to be easy. If you are reading this, please say a quick prayer for me!